You have ruined the last 3 years of my life. Actually, who are we kidding. You know everything so let's be honest. You made my life passively fun the first year or so in your lesser form. You gave me an escape from the stress, the pain, the boredom. When it 'felt' like I was caving in from everything you made it bearable, fun, warm and comfortable. What you didn't tell me was this reprieve would come at a cost. The highest cost I would ever have to pay, and I would have to pay it back with interest for all the time that passed each day. If you had told me then what I know now, I would have stayed as far away from you as I knew how. I would of picked myself up any other way. I would of made myself heal with hard work and sincere effort. Or I could of done nothing. I would of been better off the way I was when you got a hold of me then I am now. I would of viewed you as you are. As the plague. As something evil. As nothing more than lies wrapped in a pretty package and handed to me by someone I should of been able to trust. Someone that should have wanted the best for me but brought me death through you instead.
The last 2 years you have shown what you really are. How much you take for what you give. How truly robbed I have allowed myself to become because of you and you will not stop until you can take everything from me or I can find the strength to throw you away first. You've had my mind and my body but you crave my soul. My eyes are wide open now. You are an ugly thing. You take something broken and make sure it's thrown away instead of fixed. You have kept me chained to a life I don't belong in. To a situation I would have left years ago. You have truly taken me and tried to break me in every way. You have tried to keep me just below the surface of the water, gasping, struggling for my life, swallowing water. It's time for me to grab the strength I have left and fight. Fight for the sun, the air, dry land. I have worked too hard to keep you from drowning me completely. It's time to say goodbye to everything I knew and find myself again without you.
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